“Order is half life” says an old-fashioned saying. However, our children almost always see it differently: the nursery turns into a battlefield in no time at all, fighting stuffed animals, Playmobil figures and other species from the species of toys.
And even if children have certain ideas about order – we parents usually see it very differently. But how do you get your child to be or become neat? It depends on age, but also on your own role model and how constructively you help your child clean up.
Dad, what’s okay?
Toddlers could not clean their room, even if they wanted it. Because they do not know what order is. Order always means structure and that is something that has to be anchored in the child’s mind. In doing so, it helps them to imitate their parents, and they are all too happy to do so at this age – the best chance to playfully introduce the children to the topic of tidying up. You can take advantage of the sorting passion that many children from the age of three years to the day: they then clear the same with passion and endurance to the same and really enjoy things in boxes, boxes or drawers. The fun is preserved if you give it different assistance:
Always tell the child what you are doing: “So, now I’ll put the doll’s furniture in the doll’s house”.
Make clear what you want from the child. Instead of: “Broken off the books” prefer “Any book that you see here in the room, you can put in the bookshelf.”
Do not sort too differentiated, the child is overwhelmed: Building blocks can be placed in a box, whether they are made of wood or plastic.
The more toys a child has, the more difficult it is to keep track. Little kids do not need that much toys yet. Just clear up what’s uninteresting anyway, just for a while.
And always: participation is the order of the day. Do not expect your child to clean up on their own. It lives too much in the here and now.
Dispute over tidying up – your child is getting bigger
At the latest, when your child comes to school, the is over. Life is so interesting, there is tidying up and keeping a chore. If this duty is then additionally connected with arguments and reproaches, it can become an irritant topic, which affects the family peace. So please always bring serenity when it comes to the room cleaning up goes. Keep in mind that your child gradually develops his own ideas of order. It does not feel like just imitating what you fool him. Keep out where possible. And if it does not work, as with the snail collection on the bedside table, then you offer understandable solutions: So the snails are better kept in the garden anyway. However, before intervening, always check whether it is really important and sensible, or whether you only want to enforce your own ideas.
In order for your child to learn that tidying up the room is so slowly becoming his business, you should increasingly withdraw . On the other hand, there must be clear agreements: When and how often will the room be cleaned up? What are the consequences if these agreements are not followed? If your child does not want to clean up, then you should not do it, but insist that it fulfill its obligations. However, if the chaos is so great that your child is obviously overburdened, then you should offer help, because with two, it just cleans up better. Also, you can not expect a thorough cleaning at this age. Wipe out cabinets, vacuum them in all corners or bring this and that under the shelves, you have to do together with the child.
Regressing in puberty – order is out
Now order becomes a word. Chaos is the new motto. Now you can only stay out of it, because during puberty, your child is usually less accessible for arguments , ranting and complaining helps much less. Nevertheless, set up some fundamental principles:
No dishes and no leftovers in the room hoard.
Dirty laundry is only washed when it is deposited in the laundry basket.
Outside the private room, the rules of the family are observed with regard to order and cleanliness.
You can hardly expect more in this stage of the child’s development and the more relaxed and tolerant you are, the easier it will be for everyone involved.
And if, at the time of puberty, you’re worried that your child will suffocate in the dirt for the rest of their lives, then rest assured that when puberty is over, your child will surely remember what it is about you Having learned about order and implementing this in their own lives.